Poetry

Trust

Trust

Thal Mohammed

Inspired by Episode 16: Depth Hypnosis with Isa Gucciacardi

How do you organize your pain, your days?
Do you just slip under the waves?
 
The thin line between wisdom and madness 
dissipates when you are alone. 
 
Contemplation becomes rumination. 
 
Stop. Rest.
Rest now. 
Rest when you are alone.
 
Rest in the ample heart of discernment, and self-compassion. 
Unfold every moment of your being.
Unfurl the ancient language of burden that is not yours.
 
Unclasp your hands for what is not yours will not be. 
Trust your journey.
Trust in the darkness and what is unknown.

Honey

Poem by Thal Mohammed

Inspired by Episode 15: From Ecstasy to Remedy – MDMA Therapy with Anne Wagner

O, Traveler!
O, Seeker!

An inner roar jolts
and cajoles you from
the depth of shadows
and slumber.

Awaken, now.
Awaken, here.

Reluctant, you wail.
In despair, you lie

From the center
to the periphery you traverse
dune upon dune.

The taste of frivolity
no longer appeals to you.

Annihilated, you tread.
Skillfully, you tread.
Unskillfully, you tread.

The One light guiding you
in the woods, alone
and amongst others…

With awe, with love,
from the periphery to the center
you traverse

and taste honey for the first time.

Inner Work

Poem by Thal Mohammed

Inspired by Episode 14: Spiritual Inclusion with El-Farouk Khaki

You see your path is circular.
It is not linear. 
You will go back.
You will always go back to 
places and smells. 
 
You will feel the unfelt.
 
It is ok. Open you heart.
Walk with your madness. 
This is progress. Maybe.
 
Be wary when the questions dissipate.
Be wary when you have answers.
Be wary – 
when you say, “I know.”
 
 
 

Symbols

Poem by Thal Mohammed

Inspired by Episode 13: Symbols of Our Times with Jonathan Pageau
Inside the womb of things, we may find 
the hidden meaning of things.
It is like a light has been shed upon forgotten memories 
that reside in a dark corner where courage gleams.
 
Yes, courage.
 
The one that beckons us to stride forth as humans
with different hues and languages. 
 
We all mean the same thing differently.
We all mean different things in the same way.
 
Does it matter?
Does it matter?
Have we lost our capacity to imagine? 
 
Let us shed the layers of the onion.
Let us shed some tears together.

Unbeknownst To Me

Poem by Thal Mohammed

Inspired by Episode 12: Reclaiming the Inner Teen with Avi Zer-Aviv

Unbeknownst to me,
the love I carried for you 
trickled out of my pores,
stealthily. 
 
Unbeknownst to me,
the limbs I carried around 
grew paralyzed and numb,
stealthily. 
 
Unbeknownst to me,
the anger I inherited, a tree,
deciduous, re-sprouting incessantly
and stealthily.
 
When self-deception,
yours and mine, 
intermingled inside the deep night 
your tears on my tongue.
 
Our ending in your eyes,
our love melded discarded stories
of pain uttered in the silent
cry of those tricked
into false submission. 
 
Be true, my soul.
Be true, my love.
Even if it takes a thousand lifetimes,
be brave.

 

Patience

Poem by Thal Mohammed

Inspired by Episode 11: Living Your Personal Myth with Jean Shinoda Bolen

allow the light of the sun
to settle inside that open
wound you hide
 
allow the light 
 
let the soft nature 
of your heart, yes, the one 
you hide be cleansed
by every body of water
the divine has gifted
the earth and you 
 
let everyone witness
the gifts a broken heart
can offer over and over 
again and again
 
allow the light to trickle 
into the dark and damp 
parts of you because
you are beautiful now
 
join hands with those on 
the moonlit path…
you will know that stories
of pain are laughter in
disguise
 
Let the belly laugh 
Let the belly laugh

 

I’m Nobody

Poem by Thal Mohammed

Inspired by Episode 10: Enter the Sacred Field of Kabir with Andrew Harvey

“I’m Nobody! Who are you?
Are you – Nobody – too?
Then there’s a pair of us!
Don’t tell! they’d advertise – you know!”
 
– I’m Nobody! Who are you? (Emile Dickinson)
 
You asked me to quell all
inner turmoil. You asked me to
embrace silence and renounce
self-formations. You said,
self-transformation begins where
time ends. Peel away layer
upon layer of identities, and
relinquish your name.
You looked into my eyes,
“I’m Nobody! Who are you?”
 
I am a woman of dark origins.
Fragmented pieces of self float 
inside dark recesses of the mind.
Teach me how to become whole.
Teach me how to surrender to a 
rhythmical and ubiquitous world.
I have journeyed far to find a 
teacher. Forgive me & my immaturity, 
quench my questions,
“Are you – Nobody – too?” 
 
How do I shore up the waves of 
anonymity? How do I unsaddle,
after years of blindly riding through
unknown multiple routes? Like the
comic Mullah, Nasruddin, who raced
through the market place on his donkey.
“Where are you going?”, friends beseeched.
“I am busy looking for my donkey”, Nasruddin 
answered. I have no donkey to find, 
“Then there’s a pair of us!”
 
You and I are no-bodies! Our limbs 
can cage us or become wings, which spread
over the ocean of consciousness. Can
I be your disciple? A mere initiate 
of a well trodden path. Can I join 
the chain of hands? Let us abandon
our names because we are restless, and
it is dreary out there. You and I are the same. 
“Therein lies true freedom”, you said,
“Don’t tell! they’d advertise – you know!”

Do Not Remind Me

Poem by Thal Mohammed

Inspired by Episode 9: Pockets of Silence with Aryne Sheppard

Do not remind me 
that the universe unfolds inside of me,
or that I am a sentient being 
floating amidst the ocean of 
consciousness.
 
Do not remind me 
that I am more than my thoughts,
that my self-doubt is illusory,
and my lack of faith
impermanent. 
 
Do not remind me
that on the other side of my pain
and suffering grace awaits,
and that there is more to
the mundanity of our existence.
 
Do not remind me
that the world and all its components 
are a theatre of symbology, and 
layers of metaphor unfold 
at every moment with 
endless meaning.
 
I can sing all the right songs,
and remind you of the wisdom 
of the ancients…for I am a prodigy  
and I come to you from the land of
darkness and ferocious beasts.
 
I can find meaning.
I can find depth even in the darkest of nights. 
I can navigate metaphysical storms,
and fulfill my soul’s contract.  
 
You know what I want?
 
I want you to hold me
under the pure sunlight of today, 
and kiss me with the primitive
hunger of my humanity. 
 
I want your flesh against mine. 
I want to hear you breathe
against my skin.
 
Remind me that I am here, 
desiring and desirable,
that I am alive.

Summoned

Poem by Thal Mohammed

Inspired by Episode 8: Cognitive Tools to Wisdom with John Vervaeke

“Come, come, whoever you are.
Wanderer, Worshipper, lover of leaving[1]”,
but you can’t heed a summon with
limbs paralyzed, deafened by comfort.
 
Layers of dullness emulsify the soul,
oily clunks disperse in an abyss and
you, sullen, mistake the dispersal with contentment.
 
“…even if you have broken your vow a hundred times,
come, come again come”[2]but you just listen by day, 
haunted by night: dead words, weaved words, 
resurrected words.
 
Those you love transfigure one by one,
oblivious to a Melody that breaks inside 
and lets in a, “certain slant of light”.[3]
 
Our tongues, my friend, can re-learn 
sacred letters that invoke:
 
Love – that which no longer 
crosses boundaries and lines.
Love – only traverses heights and
renders a primordial being,
 
Alif – Laam – Meem,[4]
 
beyond distractions,
beyond embellishments, 
sheathed in an ancient embrace.
 
Mute the “admiring bog”[5]and taste
the whirl of dervishes: upwards it goes,
upwards, infinitely.
 
Untangle the soul’s labyrinth and 
unmask tricksters with empty words,
just like the day you heard the trees’ sway, 
when your father’s body was lowered down
because cancerous cells ravaged his brain.
 
The litany of trees reverberated inside your veins:
you too shall be lowered
you too shall be lowered 
 
We choose our gods: we create some in the morning
and kill some in the evening.
Free worshippers – 
Freedom worshippers – 
 
So tell me your fears, my friend, and let us listen:
not to the songs of flat men ravaged by history and  
bones that summon blood and spit,
flailing heads in the name of something that is
akin to a primitive darkness – 
severed from the Invoked.
 
Frightened men who want the world to end but,
“This is the way the world ends
This is the way the world ends
This is the way the worlds ends
Not with a bang but a whimper”[6]
 

[1]Mewlana Jelaludin Rumi
[2]Mewlana Jelaludin Rumi
[3]Emile Dickinson, “There’s a certain slant of light”.
[4]The first letters in the Quran, fragmented. Exegetic scholars debated their meanings for hundreds of years. Why would God invoke letters? Sufi interpretations are numerous, vastly and carry endless secrets.
[5]Emile Dickenson “I am Nobody! Who are you?”.
[6]T. S. Eliot, “The Hollow Men”. 

 

Wreckage of Winter

The wreckage of winter and
my heart coalesce 
with every moment and gesture.

The silence of unfulfilled desire
is a howl of wolves extracted
from the depths of antiquity. 

Slowly I bow to poets who come
before me for they may have said it all.
Perhaps I have to drink from every cup
of wine until I find my own.

Just like I drink your love and borrowed
words until I find my own. 
Perhaps I have already found my own,
and now I wait for you to find. 

Your skin your voice. 

Now I wait for you in the valley of those
who are tired of all the talk and noise.
Tired of an obsequious existence 
devoid of all that is original and meaningful.